...

i didnt post here in a long time.

Thats cos i thought people listened to me. Illusion i guess. So i'm back here.

The only thing that does listen to me.


I am tired of being happy.
My facial muscles are tired of having to pull my mouth into a smile, of having to entertain people with senseless conversation.

Why do you feel bored?
Is there a NEED for something to be constantly exciting?
is there a NEED for something to always be fun?


I made a list of things that make me happy.

It is a very short list. It can never see the light of day.
It can never be published.

What are the things, then, that make me unhappy?
75 and counting


Sometimes...........maybe i truly am crazy.

All that i have learnt, it is all starting to mean less and less

soon it would disappear completely.

Love.......................its supposed to be good.
Why then do i feel happy only with hate?